To All The Courageous Children Who Broke Up With Their Toxic Father | BiographyFlash
This letter is addressed to all children who have broken up with their toxic father and who have managed to find happiness far from them.
Every word comes from the bottom of my heart and I mean everything I say. I know that many of you did not have pleasant childhoods, some dealt with a narcissistic mother and others with an abusive father.
I know you expected a lot of things from your father, and you didn’t get them. And I know it hurt you a lot, because if there’s one thing that’s hard to do in life, it’s cutting ties with your toxic family.
I know a father is supposed to be a person you love more than the whole world, but the problem is that your father never showed his love to you in that way.
He was too selfish and did other things when you needed him. He wasn’t there for you when you were sad about failing a test.
He wasn’t there when he should have been teaching you how to drive.
He wasn’t there when you wanted to talk to him about things you can only talk about with your dad.
And the worst part is, all the other kids around you had great dads who spent time with them, and gave them the love and support they needed.
Unfortunately, you weren’t so lucky.And the truth is, you never asked for too much.
You just wanted your dad to be at your soccer game or a competition where you won first place. You just wanted your father to be proud of you and your achievements.
Because even though they weren’t much, those things meant so much to you.
You were just a kid who thought a father should be someone who protects you from all the bad things that could happen to you.
But your dad was never there, every time you took his hand when you were afraid of something, he let go saying that you had to face your fears alone.
Every time you wanted a hug or a kiss, when you hadn’t seen him in a while, he would tell you to get in the car without asking.
He didn’t want to know how you felt, the things going on in your life and your feelings towards him.
He was cold and distant. He acted like he wasn’t your father. He acted like he didn’t want you.
And because of all that, your heart broke into a thousand pieces. Because of his cold attitude, you thought you weren’t good enough.
You thought you were the problem, but your father was the problem.
You thought you were worthless and wondered if your father would be happier if he had someone else for a son or daughter.
You always wondered if you were doing something wrong and why your father wasn’t giving you the love you deserved.
You spent so many sleepless nights crying yourself to sleep and suffering in silence.
But you know what?
Even if you thought it was all your fault, know that it wasn’t.
You had the misfortune of being the child of an emotionally unavailable man, someone who couldn’t love anyone properly, someone who had already given up on life before he even died.
You were just another victim of a toxic father, who saw you suffering, but never gave you a hand.
So be angry, throw things at the wall, cry, do whatever you want. Let that anger come to the surface!
Let all this toxicity and anger inside you come out forever. Because if it stays inside you, it could kill you.
The frustration of not getting the love you dreamed of is so great, it could kill you emotionally.
And that’s not what you want, is it? You don’t want your father to see that he’s destroyed you, you don’t want him to see that fire in your eyes fade.
You want him to see you on your feet and with your head held high, despite all the bad things he’s done to you.
You don’t want him to find out that you were his victim and that you will carry scars on your heart for the rest of your life. No, that’s not what you want.
That’s why you have to be smart. You need to think carefully about how to successfully overcome your problems. And whatever you do, don’t try to get back at him.
Because you know, karma is a bitch and your father will have to pay for everything he did to you one day or another.
One day he will ask you for a little love, he will ask you to hold his hand firmly while he says his last words.
One day he will feel like you, like a little child in need of love and forgiveness. That day you will remember that you asked him to hold your hand when you were afraid.
And you will remember how he let go of your hand, telling you that you should face your fears alone. This memory will stab you in the heart, but you will still give it your hand.
You will forgive him for everything he did to you. You will show him that you are a bigger person than he was.
But you won’t hold on any longer than that. Because holding on to something that was never real doesn’t make sense.
And if you think about your father, if something makes you think of him and you wish he were there, don’t pick up the phone to call him.
Yes, he’s your father, he’s the one who made you, but he’s also the man who hurt you when you were most vulnerable.
You have the right to love him. But love him in a way that he never finds out. Don’t give him the satisfaction of winning in the end.